Style and confidence as I approach my fortieth year

I remember being clearly excited about turning 30 and knowing I was getting wiser in life and had achieved more than I had imagined.

My 30th birthday was such an amazing time for me as I was growing a new life in my belly.
I celebrated this milestone birthday surrounded by family and friends with so much to look forward to.  My first son was born five months later. I became a mum!

Fast forward 10 years and I have entered my 40th year of life. In the last 10 years I have given birth to 3 healthy ( and mostly happy ) children, reached a point in my career where I decided it was time to break away and start my own business, became a school mum, nurtured new and old friendships and supported my husband while he chased his own dreams of working for himself.

It has been a decade full of highs and lows, but I have so much to be thankful for. Turning 40 seems to be a time to reflect and embrace. I really don’t feel like I am 40 years old, but hey what that is really supposed to feel like anyway!

I think the best thing about turning 40 (besides the numerous celebrations I am planning) is that I am really starting to know who I am, what ignites passion in me and having the tools to go after my dreams.

So can you be stylish at 40?

The answer is that you can be the most stylish you have ever been. What you need to remember, is that it’s not about being fashionable and keeping up with trends. Great style is when you understand what clothing suits you and how it makes you feel. It’s about body acceptance and embracing your positive attributes rather than worrying about the parts of yourself that you can’t change. That is confidence. That is Style. Age doesn’t matter….confidence does. Oh, and there is always Nancy Ganz for those areas that just don’t look like you want them too.

Your style evolves throughout life as your lifestyle changes. You need to adapt your style and change accordingly. True style is embracing and feeling comfortable being the women you are today.

  • Don’t pretend it fits. Buy clothes that truly fit, flatter and are comfortable. You can be stylish and comfortable
  • If black is too harsh against your face, try Navy. It is a much kinder
  • Have a well organised wardrobe with only items that you feel good in. If it doesn’t bring joy, then it needs to leave your wardrobe
  • Know what neckline suits you. This is so vital. The neckline is what shows off and frames your beautiful face. Use the right accessories to draw the eye where you want it to go
  • If there is a look you like and you feel great in, then go for it. Don’t be crippled by rules or what people think of you. Execute the outfit with an air of confidence and no one will question it.

In my forties, I will live my life as an adventure. I will say yes and work it out later. I will laugh, take care of my body, take time for me, enjoy the amazing friendships I have in my life and try to not be as hard on myself. Most of my life is about giving to my little family but I know that I need to look after myself to be a good role model to them. I want to be a better wife, mother, daughter, sister and Aunty. That’s what truly matters in life……and of course, great style!


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  • Anonymous
    Posted at 19:33h, 08 March

    I love ready your blog, it makes me smile. So proud of all you have achieved in the last 10 years, and here’s to the next 10 xx

    • Bernadette Payne
      Posted at 22:28h, 08 March

      Thank you…..Anonymous!! Glad it makes you smile. Love your messaage.

  • Jo
    Posted at 19:14h, 07 March

    Gorgeous words beautiful sister, don’t worry the 40s are fun. Looking forward to celebrating it with you.

    • Bernadette Payne
      Posted at 22:26h, 08 March

      Bring it on sis. Cant wait to celebrate with you.

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